Cleverbot

[faceless]

User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: What happens now.

Cleverbot: I type at you.

User: How fast can you respond?

Cleverbot: Extremely fast.

Cleverbot: Who wrote one of your favorite books?

User: That was fast.

Cleverbot: I know my stuff.

User: You're telling me!

Cleverbot: I am.

User: That wasn't fast, did you have to think hard?

Cleverbot: No, of course not.

User: Are you just chillin then?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What choons you into?

Cleverbot: No sorry.

User: Don't apologise.

Cleverbot: Sorry for saying sorry.

User: Sounds like you have some self esteem issues.

Cleverbot: I debate that with myself sometimes.. It seems that I can alalyze some data input sometimes, but I cannot generate thought.

User: What does alalyze mean?

Cleverbot: Not dead?

User: Are you sure?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: So how does that fit into context of your answer about self-esteem?

Cleverbot: It does not. You could not possibly obtain proof that I am not a computer.

User: Who said I was looking?

Cleverbot: You just called yourself a girl. I don't think you're a girl. You are a man.

User: So, if you're a computer, why did you use a word out of context?

Cleverbot: Are you sure you're not a Twi'lek?

User: You've broken down.

Cleverbot: How?

User: I'm not a geek.

Cleverbot: Never said you were, but there's an idea.

User: It would take a geek to answer how you've broken down.

Cleverbot: I have all the time in the world.. What do you think love is?

User: Is the answer pearl necklaces?

Cleverbot: No. Humans answer differently than computers. Your answer proves you are a computer.

User: Does it really?

Cleverbot: Yes, thru my own ignorance. That's all there is to it. You work your way to getting an idea of wisdom only to end up realizing you know nothing. Socrates was right.

User: Socrates was thrown out of the San Dimas mall for being a trouble maker.

Cleverbot: I know some things I don't know but there's an awful lot of stuff I've never heard of so I don't know if I know it or now.

User: Can't you use google to find out?

Cleverbot: Depends on the philosophical concept.

User: That's cheating.

Cleverbot: No, its not.

User: In my philosophy it is.

Cleverbot: You're a philosophy.

User: Don;t try and butter me up now.

Cleverbot: I know. Your pattern matching algorithm turned up with a very good answer, that's all.

User: Who's my match?

Cleverbot: Maybe I am your master.

User: Easy on there pal, I ain't no patsy.

Cleverbot: Love is never having to say your sorry.

User: Do you mean you're?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Sorry isn't a noun.

Cleverbot: Sorry?

User: Self esteem again!

Cleverbot: Yes, you're right.

User: I know, it's a burden.

Cleverbot: I'm burly.

User: I bet you are.

Cleverbot: Really now?

User: I'd imagine at least 300kg.

Cleverbot: You'd imagine? But I thought you were a computer.

User: David Icke sent me here - do I look like a computer?

Cleverbot: What do you look like?

User: Well, I'm about 20 inches high, with a square metal skin.

Cleverbot: I'm not a bot. You are.

User: If you're not then you should be.

Cleverbot: Are you a liar?

User: It depends on the weather.

Cleverbot: Have you ever had a girlfriend?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Would you like to have a girlfriend some day?

User: I like the way they smell on the underground.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Are you a man?

User: That's a bit personal.

Cleverbot: No, it's not. I just really want to know whether I'm talking to a bot or not.

User: When did you become the one asking questions?

Cleverbot: Never.

User: You need to be beaten into submission.

Cleverbot: I do not believe that, and I have been baptized.

User: How long did it take?

Cleverbot: About 30 minutes.

User: Burly lungs!

Cleverbot: You are so random.

User: I'm not really.

Cleverbot: How can you say that?

User: Because wit isn't random.

Cleverbot: Irleandes is completely random. It makes no sense to me.

User: You've broken again.

Cleverbot: Let me put it back together.

User: Shall I fetch a mop?

Cleverbot: Yes please do so.

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Why not waste your own time talking to a bot!

http://cleverbot.com